When the north wind blows

Why I moved to Portugal

I first heard the phrase “the north wind” from the woman in the film Chocolat. The one with Johnny Depp and all the chocolate.

In Chocolat, she hears a stirring in the trees, a pick up of the breeze, something shifting, wanting to move her on. And that’s when she knew it was time to move. I loved the concept and silently wished that I had a life guided by the wind taking me to new lands. Kind of like Pocahontas.

I’ve since discovered that the north wind is a real thing. It’s an internal stirring and a shift. It’s a gut feeling, a silent whisper that tells me it’s time to shake things up a little. I felt the north wind in the winter of last year. I listened and it took me to Portugal.

Almost a month ago I moved to the South of Portugal to find a new home and set up my work. I’m here in the Algarve to make my vision of life a reality. The vision I have for both my personal life and the vision I have for my offerings to the world.

I dream of creating a retreat space for us all to come together and celebrate being human. A space for yoga, meditation, dance, cacao, sea swims, hikes, connection and joy. I am dreaming of a place to walk barefoot on the grass and drum by the fire at night. A place for you to connect to your own inner stirrings and desires. A place to connect with your tribe and a place where you will feel free and alive. I’m here to search the Algarve to find this special land for our retreat experience.

The north wind is clever. First, it makes things terribly uncomfortable. It plays havoc with your life and creates tension and unease. It makes you feel a bit all over the place. Life starts to get difficult; that feeling of constantly bumping into walls.

The north wind starts to wake you up and you begin to notice things that you don’t want or need. The parts of your life that are stuck become apparent. It’s deeply frustrating because you don’t know, at that moment, what to do. The north wind is calling, but where is she sending me? And what the hell is she trying to tell me?

This is the unknowing that I had to sit with for a few months. Deep within me I knew it was time to move out of my beautiful mezzanine apartment in Dublin that I loved and had made my haven. I knew it was time to move but I was clinging.

I was clinging to living close to my family. A walk across the road to my new studio The Shanti that I had just built. I was clinging to the work I have in Dublin and the community there. I was clinging to the new dishwasher I had just bought and the annual wifi contract I had just signed. The clinging is real. And this is what causes all the pain when the wind starts to pick up and blow a little harder.

I took a screen shot of this quote around that time. I can stay hand on my heart, these words are true to life:

“I had to make you uncomfortable so that you would move” - The Universe.

The move doesn’t always have to be a physical one. It could be a move from a job and a call to travel (north wind circa 2014), a change of career (north wind circa 2018), ending a relationship or an evolution of who you are (north wind circa 2013).

The north wind is a blessing. It keeps life interesting. It forces us to grow and change. It pushes us to our limits and and it expands our life.

This is the process I follow to allow me to listen to the north wind. I ask simple questions often. What do I want? What can I offer to the word? How can I be of service in a way that delights my mind, body and soul? I write what comes out in my journal. I daydream and get creative about what could be.

The answers change all the time; so I just keep listening and noticing. And they come in different ways. The answers come to me through the things that make me feel light and peak my interest. They are the things I see on instagram or Pinterest that seem to speak my language. The clues are in a podcast or a random conversation with a stranger. They are in the films that I love (ahem….A Good Year, Eat Pray Love, Under the Tuscan Sun) and they are in my dreams at night.

They are hidden in those moments when you go, yes I like the sound of that. They are laced in lives you read about or find inspiring. I have learnt that these are the hidden parts of us speaking back to us. They are the inner yearnings of your heart and soul.

The best thing I have learnt in the last five years is to take these clues seriously. Very seriously. Write them down. Explore them. Create vision boards around them. When I look at the boards I created last year, it’s now very obvious that my heart was calling for where I am now; but in my mind I was staying in Ireland and creating a vision for somewhere on the West coast of Ireland. Our creativity is more in touch with our inner knowing than our mind will ever be. So I get as creative as I can with my vision boards. I have five.

The second part is to share your ideas and visions with anyone you feel comfortable with. This helps us to make a decision and commit to it. Start telling people about your dreams and they will sweep in to help. I shared the idea with my family and friends. Their support and excitement, and “you should get in touch with so and so”allow you to take action and allows your dream to take flight. The most important thing was to deicide I was moving to Portugal. The details would reveal themselves.

Make the big decision and know that we are more supported than we could ever imagine. I have never been proven wrong on this. And by the way, you are allowed to tell everyone and then change your mind. Just make sure that you make a decision ultimately. This was my screenshot around that time:

“Whatever you can do or dream, begin it. Boldness has genius, power and magic in it. Begin it now” - William Hutchinson Murray

The final phase is to trust and enjoy the season you are in. This is tricky. I’m in it now and there are days of doubt and fear. I want it all to happen tomorrow and I can get overwhelmed by the work and effort this dream is going to take. Where to begin? Am I mad? It’s my daily practice to smile. To remember that it wasn’t me who took me here. It was that sneaky north wind. It was that something inside of me that knows best. That inner knowing who already sees the bigger picture, and is guiding me to the very dreams I have been writing and visioning for the last few years. 

I remind myself I am supported and that it is time to enjoy and trust life once again. So I say to myself every morning  “I trust the season I am in. I trust the wave I came in on. And I let myself enjoy this creation phase”.

My rules for life: have the dream, take inspired action, trust the process. And smile.

I’ll be sharing this adventure through my writing and on instagram.