The Good Glow Podcast

My chat with Georgie on The Good Glow

I joined Georgie Crawford on The Good Glow Podcast this week. It was a great experience. A really enjoyable way to tell my story.

I received lovely messages from The Good Glow listeners. People who relate to my story; people who are unsure of what next step to take in life; and those trying to work out whether to change jobs.

This piece is for those who are facing these questions and got in touch with me. I thought I’d share a little more about how I knew I needed to leave my career.

This was the hardest thing to work out. It was a time in the dark; a time of confusion, feeling lost and not knowing what to do. I wrote down a quote from Queen Oprah around this time:

“When you don’t know what to do, do nothing. Get quiet so you can hear the still, small voice – you inner GPS guiding you to true North “.

 I use this method over and over again. Yoga and meditation allow me to be quiet. I listen and I write. And I let myself be guided by my inner wisdom, my intuition, my soul’s purpose. Whatever you want to call it.

Six months before I left my job, I heard this voice loud and clear. It was Monday. I was back in the office after being away in an ashram in India. I spent three weeks in Kerala after Christmas 2018 practicing yoga, meditation, living in community doing karma yoga and eating vegan food. Going to bed early and getting up to chant at sunrise.

I floated into the office after returning home. I was calm, rested and healthy. I felt wonderful. That day I was pulled into a corporate transaction that was closing at the end of the week. I was at my desk until 10pm. I looked in the mirror as I left the office that night. My eyes were bloodshot from staring at a screen. I was hungry and exhausted and my skin had noticeably lost its glow. All in 24 hours. I knew then that this wasn’t right for me.

This experience might resonate with some people. For others, they may be able to thrive in this type of environment. If you can and stay healthy, then this might not seem such a bad day at the office working on a big transaction. If we listen to how our body reacts to the work environment we are in; this is a good read on whether the work place is affecting us in a positive or in a negative way.

I never felt my true self in work. I felt uncomfortable and my self-esteem was low. I never knew why because in other parts of my life I felt self-assured. I tried to read the business section of the papers every Sunday. But I was fooling myself, I was more interested in reading the wellness articles in the paper. Reading Ekhart Tolle and Deepak Chopra. Googling “Buddhism in Ireland” and “understanding Ayurveda”. I thought this was silly and maybe a waste of time. I see now that it wasn’t.

Our interests are never silly. They are the fabric of who we are. I was working in something I wasn’t interested in. Some people are interested in business and law and then a law firm is a great place to explore these interests. Once I started to take my interests seriously, I realised I was not in the place I was supposed to be.

I began to follow my curiosity and interests. And then my two worlds became very different places. I was in an ashram one week and a corporate office the next. I felt like an elastic band being pulled in opposite directions. Living a life of two extremes.  I think I would have eventually snapped. I left before this could happen.

I wanted desperately to find a middle ground, where I could indulge and follow my interests. Dive deeper into the world that I am fascinated by. I wanted to find a life where I could spend every day exploring my interests instead of hiding them away for the weekend.

This has been a sacrifice. I now earn a small fraction of what I ever earned as a solicitor. I will write about this more in another piece sometime, because this is the reality. I have changed my life to match my lower income. But I am also the happiest I have ever been in my life. As my number one reggae maestro, Bob Marley says:

“Money is numbers and numbers never end, if it takes money to be happy, your search will never end”.

Bob has been a massive source of inspiration in how I live my life. I’m sure he would be pleased to hear that. Bob and Oprah! Legends.

As for the romance that went terribly wrong on the Camino. Thank you for asking… a story for another day.

Thanks to everyone who got in touch. We all face similar problems. We are all trying to work it out. How to be our most authentic selves in this life. It’s a continuous journey.

If the episode provided you with some help or inspiration, I am delighted. Thanks to Georgie for having me on. She’s a brave soul who is helping to spread a very important message: look after ourselves.